Goldstein Staycation

We are wrapping up 2 weeks of vacation time with us off of work and Jake out of school.
It has been fantastic!

A few highlights.... Zipline Safari at a place called Forever Florida. It was actually sprinkling
the day we went so we opted not to bring our camera. Talk about missed opportunity.

But it was amazing. I was terrified because I'm scared of heights but after you go the first time,
it was pretty awesome.

Then we stayed 2 glorious nights at the Portofino Hotel on Universal property. We went to Islands
of Adventure whereJake rode his first roller coaster! It was the ice side of Dueling Dragons.
He loved it so much that he went on to ride fire andThe Hulk. This was a big deal and I'm so lucky
to experience things like this with Jake.

We also went to Kennedy Space Center and Fantasy of Flight. If you've never been to Fantasy of
Flight and live in Orlando, you are missing out-that place was awesome. We also took Jake to a
show at SAK Comedy Lab - so fun to see him discover the thingswe have loved over the years.

Now it's back to reality---work and treatment, back to school and soccer season. I'm so lucky to be
here!!

Laura

It's My Birthday Month!!!

That's right people. I have a birthday month. Tra la la!!

I made it to 36 years old! Life is good. I am surrounded by people that love me and care about me and I'm grateful for each and every one of yous out there.

The new medicine has a lot less side effects than the last one so I am doing really well. I'll get scanned again in 3 months and hopefully it will also be kicking serious cancer booty. I'm just keepin' on keepin' on for now.

All is good.

Love, Laura

Life Enthusiast

Waiting for Side Effects

So, now we wait. I got an infusion of the new medicine, Navilbine, this morning. It was much shorter than the old one, but I'll have to get them more frequently. So far so good. I slept for a bit afterwards, but don't have the feeling that I was run over by a truck like I used to. So that's good.

It will be 3 weeks on, 1 week off-what a pain in the ass to try to plan things around. But I'm glad I'm still here and able to do things, don't get me wrong.

The waiting to see how the medicine affects your body and your emotions is one of the worst parts about "the cancer journey". Did I ever mention that I hate when people call it "the cancer journey". Really? Journey? Like self discovery and personal growth and all that shit? Yes, it happens but it doesn't feel as pure and spiritual when the journey was not your choice. Cancer---go journey with someone that deserves it--someone in jail for messing with little kids or someone who hacks into emails because they really could use some chemo distraction to fill the void.

Journey shmourney. Cancer's a trip!

Smooches!
Laura

Stupid Liver

Apparently, my liver is not on board with the gameplan. My liver does not realize that I am kind of a bad ass. My liver does not appreciate that the cancer is shrinking in EVERY other area of my body except there. My liver is a stubborn ass.

The brilliant, non-committal, too much of a wuss to make a decision because they are so afraid to get sued radiologist put in my CT results that instead of the two remaining lesions (that word's my favorite), there are multiple lesions. And the largest of the two previous lesions has grown an entire centimeter. Just what does multiple mean? No one can tell you. Multiple means more than one. Could be 3, could be 15, could even be 50. Lesions, lesions, lesions.

So, tomorrow I will start a new IV chemo and get off the Ironitican (yay!). Navilbene is what I start tomorrow and I will be going once a week for infusions for 3 weeks on, then have one week off. They think the side effects will be less than this last one, but we'll see. I should definitely experience fatigue and maybe hair loss again, but that depends on who you ask. When I ask each of the nurses and then the doctor, I get 3 different opinions on what will happen to my hair. It's like a mini-adventure.

So, being stable for 8 months on Ironitican/Avastin/Zometa/Tykerb combo was a very good run. Now we are looking for the same stability with Navilbene/Avastin/Zometa/Tykerb.

Lesions.

Damn you lesions!!!

Yes, sometimes I am not cheerful

The last 4 or 5 scans have been amazing! The cancer is shrinking and I am a walking miracle. They moved my schedule to chemo every 3 weeks instead of every 2 weeks which has been super awesome fantastic. I can't even tell you how great having an extra week of energy has been and how lucky I feel.

Which brings me to today.

I had a CT scan last Monday. I'm supposed to meet with Dr. Shah on Tuesday, June 16th for the results. Regularly scheduled chemo is June 17th but my doctor and I have been entertaining the thought that if this CT scan is the same good news, perhaps we could do chemo every 4 weeks. I've been praying and hoping and clinging to this! I was sure this was going to happen, people. I felt it in my soul that it was going to happen. But alas, it's not happenin'.

My boss approached me about doing a pretty big project next week and I wasn't sure I could commit with the upcoming doctor's visit and potential chemo day. So, I called yesterday to try to get my CT scans early, expecting it to be the same news it's been for months. I asked if I could skip the appointment (they are usually quick anyway) and get the news over the phone. Still sure the news was good.

Jeanie, a nurse I have never spoken to that was covering for my regular nurse, called me to say that Dr. Shah would like me to keep my doctor's appointment on Tuesday because ... and I quote ... "the lungs look better but the liver looks worse." But then Jeanie could not tell me anything else and told me that I had to talk to Dr. Shah on Tuesday. I quietly got off the phone and cried.

Then I called back and left a message asking if I could go in today for the results rather than wait until Tuesday. Then the amazing and wonderful Natalia called me back. She is Dr. Shah's medical assistant that I've known for quite some time. She had overheard Jeanie calling me and knew she was the one that needed to call me back.

Natalia said that Dr. Shah is out of town both days and that I have to wait until Tuesday to see her. She said that yes, that was how the scan went, but not to worry because Dr. Shah would have a plan. She called it a minor setback and encouraged me to try to have a little fun this weekend to keep my mind off of it for now.

So that's what I'm doing. I'm working and I have to work this Sunday. I'm battling to push the dark thoughts and fears out and sometimes that goes moment by moment. It doesn't help that we lost 2 women in my Mets support group this past week. Crappy timing for a bad scan.

But hey-I'm not in charge and never have been. I'm a walking miracle and God is still here.

And I went to a "bring your gold" party last night and made $84 off a necklace that I never wore because it pinched my skin. So that's good.

Smooches!
Laura

Hello everyone!!! I had scans at the end of April and met with the doctor at the beginning of May. I'm happy to report that all is stable in my world still. The cancer activity is about the same and nothing new is popping up which translates to something pretty spectacular from a medical perspective. So yay!!! Celebrate!

I received these amazing graphs from my doctor showing my tumor markers (numbers measuring the # of tumors flying around my body) dropping dramatically for the last year. There seems to be a problem with our scanner and if I can figure it out, I definitely will have it posted here. That visual following the treatment journey is priceless.

So, we are currently continuing with the same chemo combo--Tykerb pills in the morning, then an infusion of Ironitican/Avastin every three weeks. Manageable for now, I'm a lucky, lucky girl.

This week, I did experience some chest pain which was, to say the least, kind of scary. When you're in cancer treatment you have to alert your medical peeps right away if something changes. So I did. They ordered a CT scan (my personal favorite-NOT) STAT to rule out a pulmonary embolism. So there we were, rushy rushy freak out... to make sure I didn't have a clot in my lungs. And just as a tip, don't google "pulmonary embolism" if you're waiting for test results to tell you if you have one. Do as I say, not as I do. Heh heh.

So, I ended up at my primary doctor who is AWESOME!! And realized that I have something normal people can get which is not cancer related at all. Hooray!!! The constant sneezing (and other details I will spare you) from seasonal/all year round Florida allergies has stressed the cartilage around my sternum and inflamed the tissue. I got some new meds to get the allergies under control and I'll probably see some relief to the chest pains in the upcoming weeks.

So, let's pop some Advil in the meantime and if you see me grasping my chest in pain, don't worry. It's all good.

Muchos Smoochos!
Laura

Rah Rah Me!!!

I'm doing really well. The extra week in between chemo appointments is awesome. I just need to start exercising again! Jake is in little league and they are finally at the age where they know what to do with the ball when they get it. It's very exciting. We are making a lot of changes to our house and just got rid of the wall in between the dining room and the back room. It is so freeing!

Keep praying and cheering and let's never speak of this chearleading photo again. Yes, that's me in the middle. Where did those hot legs go?